Happy Birthday, Abie Baby...

Since it's 1:52am, it's technically Presidents' Day.  Abraham Lincoln's birthday was seven days ago and George Washington's was eight, but whatever.

This, along with the current election shit that's already hitting the fan, makes me wonder what our founding fathers would think of the government these days.  Yes, I know Lincoln was not a founding father.

There have always been "sides", cliques, parties, whatever, since the dawn of time.  Sometimes a girl like me, however, just doesn't know where she belongs!  The liberals piss me off because, as the sayings go, they don't want to get jobs/use facts/allow babies to be born/etc.  The extreme right, on the other hand, pisses me off because they insist on putting God into everything, perpetuating an ancient caste system that should have never occurred in America, and having a tendency to skew things into what they want it to be.  

What I really want to be is a Socialist.  I truly believe that if everyone actually had to work for the irrefragable greater good, they might fucking do it.  There is too much distance between the rich and the poor, and us middle class people are the ones suffering.  How can the middle class be determined by $15k-$250k per year?!  If Poke made $250k per year, I'd be wearing diamonds in my pussy and 4L would have gold-plated diapers.  We live off of $27k, and barely make it.  Thanks to WIC, we don't have to buy food for 4L, but that is only 1/3 of our monthly grocery bill.  What are we supposed to do when he starts eating real food, and more of it?  Currently we get 32 jars of baby food in a month, and he eats 2/day - that's clearly not enough.  I have to supplement with actual food, which is fine because I want him to eat what I cook and get used to it, but there are some things that aren't nutritionally sound for a 7 month old!  We don't qualify for any other kind of aid, and even though I have no job and no income at all, I don't qualify for any kind of Medicare/Medicaid.  It's BULL.  Meanwhile there are people out there buying alcohol, cigarettes, and all kinds of fried fucking chicken with their goddamn EBT cards.  

Not.Fair.

But I digress.

I have a friend who is a conspiracy theorist (a real one, not the speculative kind like Poke used to be), and a friend who is a die-hard liberal.  I don't have too many straight-up conservative friends, although one comes pretty close.  I respect all of their opinions, I don't always agree, but sometimes I just can't understand.  It seems like the folks who are set squarely into one of these groups (whatever group they choose) always has to run screaming into the conversation, blasting those who disagree or are different, and stating reasons why their group is the only/best group.  It's fucking ridiculous!

To me, some things just aren't important enough to be a true political affair - women changing their last name, light bulbs, living on the moon.  Then, there are the things that are important - abortion, taxes, health care... that's where I get all stretched out.  I can sum up my feelings in three neat bullets:

• Abortion = Murder
• Taxes should be lower for me (and those who make less than me), and higher for those who make more than me.
• Health care should be publicly funded (See: France)

I guess that's it for today.  Here's a video for you, in honor of Presidents' Day!

*Does not connotate affiliation with the modern Tea Party

Videos You Need to Watch (and why)

3oh!3 - "Don't Trust Me"



This song absolutely RULES. It's dirty, nasty, and it makes me wanna fuck someone's brains right outta their head. I especially love the hook - "Shush girl, shut your lips! Do the Helen Keller and talk with your hips!" Nice. Plus the one dude looks like Seann William Scott...mmm...

Theory of a Deadman - "Hate My Life"



I totally feel this song. My ex-husband used to make fun of me because I'd always tell him "I hate my life" - but I really did! Now someone has put my feelings to lyrics to music and I dig it. Also, the lead singer is hot - too bad he looks kinda like Poke.

One Republic - "Apologize"



Always loved this song, never checked out the video til recently. The video actually isn't all that great, a little too artsy-fartsy for me, but still kinda cool. I was totally stoked when Kris Allen did it on American Idol, but I was highly disappointed when I heard the Timbaland hip-hop version. Eww.

Kanye West - "Heartless"



LOVE LOVE LOVE this song and video! I know lots of people don't care for Kanye, but I really don't think about that kinda shit. I think he makes great music and it's so fucking catchy while still having some meaning behind it. This song reminds me of my relationship with Poke - just switch the "he" to "she" and so on. So true.

The Ting-Tings - "That's Not My Name"



Hahaha. Yeah, I've been that girl who sleeps around a lot and I often wonder if ol' dude remembers my name the next week... Hilarious song, catchy, fun.


That's about all I've got for now. Enjoy.

Hilarious.

That's a Big 10-4

Well it's about 4:20am, I got home from dropping Poke at the bus station about an hour ago, maybe a little less. Shucks.

Blizzard '08

YAY! SNOW!

We're still under a level 2 emergency, which means that nobody should be out or on the roads, but it's not illegal. Level 3 means they can ticket you or arrest you for being on the roads. Super AWESOME!

So, things have been going exactly my way. This makes me nervous that something terrible is going to happen to me, because I can't believe that for once my luck has actually changed.

First, I got approved for a supplemental student loan. I should have my money in a week or so! Yay!

Second, I probably have a new job at Steak'n'Shake. Not only are the hours better, but it's closer (I mean way close - not even 1/2 mile from my house, as opposed to DQ which is about 12 miles) and there's no bitchy boss's wife who hates me to deal with. Yay!

Third, Poke leaves tomorrow morning (if the busses are running that is) for Pennsylvania. He's going to trucking school. The one thing I never thought he would do, he's doing it. The one thing that was the determining factor for whether or not I give him a chance, he's doing it. That to me shows that he really does love me and really does care, because now he's got a real plan. He's making steps to improve himself to improve our relationship. This makes me happy. I'm not saying yet that we are definitely 100% getting back together, cuz I want to make sure he really goes through with this first, but it's looking pretty good. Yay!

So that's three things that have gone my way. They say everything comes in threes, so now I'm just so scared that a really awful something will happen. I hate this bad luck shit! I guess one shitty thing already did happen, I told DBH that I'm not interested in a relationship anymore, and he got pretty angry/upset and hasn't talked to me for about a week. He thinks it's all about Poke, I tried to explain to him that it's not, but he won't listen. It has everything to do with him being 500+ miles away, me having to kick up the juice at school and getting a new job where I work more hours, and most of all the fact that he disappeared on me for 4 days, I felt like shit the whole time, and when he finally started talking to me again, it was like nothing ever happened. I didn't even get an explanation from him as to why he stopped talking to me. So fuck that, I can't have all those "conditions" around a relationship. I thought we could still be friends, but since he's stopped talking to me again, I guess that's not going to happen. Live and let live I suppose.

Well, I have to figure out how I'm going to get my car out of the parking spot. The plow came by like 8 times last night and just piled the shit up on my bumper, and my poor little car is literally buried. Oh well, we'll see how it goes...

Here are a couple of videos for your viewing enjoyment:






And now: Pics!

23 Minutes in Hell

----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: Ian G
Date: Feb 18, 2008 6:30 PM


From: ATHEISTS AGNOSTICS SKEPTICS & HUMANISTS ON MYSPACE
Date: Feb 18, 2008 5:12 PM

Enemy - New Favorite Song

The words you used were mine, used a thousand times
Doesn't make them what I've bled
I hated you, I loathed you
Though felt, I never let the words begin to spill

Make me sick 'till I can't breathe
Never want to be your enemy
Silence me, so I can't be,
Never want to be your enemy
I walk the

High road away from you
God knows what I've been through
This is the life I have, this is the life I choose
I walked away, the high road away from you
Walk away, walk away, you made an enemy

I never, I never wanted, I never wanted to poison or burn through
Labeled malcontent, by bastards of decent,
excuse this place I stand, words are to elude you

Make me sick 'till I can't breathe
Never want to be your enemy
Silence me, so I can't be,
Never want to be your enemy
I walk the

High road away from you
God knows what I've been through
This is the life I have, this is the life I choose
I walked away, the high road away from you
Walk away, walk away, you made an enemy

Deep inside realize never want to be your enemy
Change me, rearrange me, make me your enemy (Yeah)
Deep inside realize never want to be your enemy (Walk away from)
Change me, rearrange me, make me your enemy (Enemy, yeah)
Deep inside realize never want to be your enemy (Walk away from)
Change me, rearrange me, make me your enemy, your enemy
I walk the

High road away from you
God knows what I've been through
This is the life I have, this is the life I choose
I walked away, the high road away from you
Walk away, walk away, you made an enemy

The Only Thing That's Real

I haven't been this depressed in years. I may have written before about being sad or miserable, but I am really truly depressed at this moment. I didn't get approved for the student loan to help with extra finances, so now I can't go to school. There is no way I can pay my bills just working at DQ, so I've applied for a waitressing job at this restaurant down the street. Why does this shit happen to me? What the fuck have I ever done? I'm so embarassed too because I told everyone that I was going to Culinary School and now I'm just stuck at the DQ praying to god or whomever that I can get my shit together. I have to get poverty assistance to pay my utilities, well, I should say I have to try because I probably make too much money to qualify for any aid.



If you have no place to live and nothing to live for, what's the point of being alive? I'm in so much emotional pain right now. I've never felt like this before. 2007 has been the worst year of my entire life. Every time something shitty happened, I would say "Ok. That's it. There is nothing shittier than this." and then something WAY shittier would happen. Like getting laid off and then GMaP dying.

Jesus Christ, when will it end?

I Love GMaP

I Rule at Making Videos!

Wig in a Box

If only I had the wig part... *sniff* I still feel the same way as he does, like when I go to karaoke I can be someone completely different and just rock the fuck out. Hell yah. I should get a crazy Dolly Parton wig.

Cupid, that Bastard

And the old one...

Cupid should be shot with a bullet in his chubby cherub head.

Things Fall Apart in the Heart of Darkness

I'll just let the title and the following videos/lyrics speak for themselves. I'm too emotionally exhausted to make an effort.



"The Origin of Love" - Hedwig & the Angry Inch

When the earth was still flat,
And the clouds made of fire,
And mountains stretched up to the sky,
Sometimes higher,
Folks roamed the earth
Like big rolling kegs.
They had two sets of arms.
They had two sets of legs.
They had two faces peering
Out of one giant head
So they could watch all around them
As they talked; while they read.
And they never knew nothing of love.
It was before the origin of love.

The origin of love

And there were three sexes then,
One that looked like two men
Glued up back to back,
Called the children of the sun.
And similar in shape and girth
Were the children of the earth.
They looked like two girls
Rolled up in one.
And the children of the moon
Were like a fork shoved on a spoon.
They were part sun, part earth
Part daughter, part son.

The origin of love

Now the gods grew quite scared
Of our strength and defiance
And Thor said,
"I'm gonna kill them all
With my hammer,
Like I killed the giants."
And Zeus said, "No,
You better let me
Use my lightening, like scissors,
Like I cut the legs off the whales
And dinosaurs into lizards."
Then he grabbed up some bolts
And he let out a laugh,
Said, "I'll split them right down the middle.
Gonna cut them right up in half."
And then storm clouds gathered above
Into great balls of fire

And then fire shot down
From the sky in bolts
Like shining blades
Of a knife.
And it ripped
Right through the flesh
Of the children of the sun
And the moon
And the earth.
And some Indian god
Sewed the wound up into a hole,
Pulled it round to our belly
To remind us of the price we pay.
And Osiris and the gods of the Nile
Gathered up a big storm
To blow a hurricane,
To scatter us away,
In a flood of wind and rain,
And a sea of tidal waves,
To wash us all away,
And if we don't behave
They'll cut us down again
And we'll be hopping round on one foot
And looking through one eye.

Last time I saw you
We had just split in two.
You were looking at me.
I was looking at you.
You had a way so familiar,
But I could not recognize,
Cause you had blood on your face;
I had blood in my eyes.
But I could swear by your expression
That the pain down in your soul
Was the same as the one down in mine.
That's the pain,
Cuts a straight line
Down through the heart;
We called it love.
So we wrapped our arms around each other,
Trying to shove ourselves back together.
We were making love,
Making love.
It was a cold dark evening,
Such a long time ago,
When by the mighty hand of Jove,
It was the sad story
How we became
Lonely two-legged creatures,
It's the story of
The origin of love.
That's the origin of love.



"Whisky in the Jar" - Metallica


"Dragula" - Rob Zombie



"Somewhere" - Il Divo

Somewhere

There's a place for us,
Somewhere a place for us.
Peace and quiet and open air
Wait for us
Somewhere

There's a time for us,
Some day a time for us,
Time together and time to spare,
Time to learn, time to care …

Some day
Somewhere
We'll find a new way of living,
We'll find a way of forgiving
Somewhere …

There's a place for us,
Somewhere a place for us
Time together and time to spare,
Time to learn, time to care …

Some day
Somewhere
We'll find a new way of living,
We'll find a way of forgiving
Somewhere …

Hold my hand and I'll take you there
Somehow,
Some day,
Somewhere!

Yes, it's true.

"Crazy" - Gnarls Barkley

I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that face.
Even your emotions had an echo
In so much space

And when you're out there
Without care,
Yeah, I was out of touch
But it wasn't because I didn't know enough
I just knew too much

Does that make me crazy?
Does that make me crazy?
Does that make me crazy?
Probably

And I hope that you are having the time of your life
But think twice, that's my only advice

Come on now, who do you, who do you, who do you, who do you think you are,

Ha ha ha bless your soul
You really think you're in control

Well, I think you're crazy
I think you're crazy
I think you're crazy
Just like me

My heroes had the heart to lose their lives out on a limb
And all I remember is thinking, I wanna be like them
Ever since I was little, ever since I was little it looked like fun
And it's no coincidence I've come
And I can die when I'm done

But Maybe I'm crazy
Maybe you're crazy
Maybe we're crazy
Probably

Uh, uh

A Tribute to Anonymous and All The Haterz

I know I already posted this video and the lyrics about a month and a half ago, but you know what? It's become REAL this time. Really real. Note my notations in the lyrics, and also remember that I'm not saying that what this Anonymous said is what hurts, I'm referring to the situation from whence I've emerged.




"Not Ready to Make Nice" - The Dixie Chicks

Forgive, sounds good. [I can always forgive.]
Forget, I'm not sure I could. [I'll never forget.]
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting. [It hasn't been that long, but this really hurt.]

I'm through, with doubt,
There's nothing left for me to figure out, [I'm happy now, without you in my life.]
I've paid a price, and I'll keep paying. [In tears and anger.]

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell,
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round. [Life moves on without you!]
It's too late to make it right,
I probably wouldn't if I could.
Cause I'm mad as hell,
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should. [Admit to something I never did.]

I know you said,
Why can't you just get over it?
It turned my whole world around,
and I kind of like it. [Now that you're gone, I'm happier than ever.]

I made my bed, and I sleep like a baby,
With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
It's a sad sad story
When a mother will teach her daughter
That she ought to hate a perfect stranger. [Perhaps his family could have been objective?]
And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter,
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over?! [Well she didn't say "sing" but she said shut up!]

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell,
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round.
It's too late to make it right,
I probably wouldn't if I could.
Cause I'm mad as hell,
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should,

I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell,
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round.
It's too late to make it right,
I probably wouldn't if I could.
Cause I'm mad as hell,
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should.

Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting.
[But in the end, I'm glad you're gone. All of you.]

Happy Happy Emu Emu

Remember when I felt like this?


Well now I feel more like this!


And it's wonderful. KS called me today on his lunch break. I almost had 117 cows.

Now it's time for a video! This video came on while KS and I were laying in bed Saturday morning. It was the first time I'd ever seen it, and I already liked the song, so now when I hear it, I'm reminded of that wonderful moment when he woke up and looked into my eyes. *grin*




"Candyman" by Christina Aguilera

(Tarzan and Jane were swingin' on a vine)
Candy man, candy man

(Sippin' from a bottle of vodka double wine)
Sweet, sugar, candy man

Hey, uh
I met him out for dinner on a Friday night
He really got me working up an appetite
He had tattoos up and down his arm
There's nothing more dangerous than a boy with charm
He's a one stop jive, makes my panties drop
He's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candy man
A sweet talkin' sugar coated candy man

Ooh, yeah, yeah
He took me to this cotton club on Hollywood & Vine
We drank champagne and we danced all night
We shook the paparazzi for a big surprise (a big surprise)
....
He's a one stop jive, makes my cherry pop
He's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candy man (ooh yeah)
A sweet talkin sugar coated candy man

(Scatting)

Hey, yeah
Oh, yeah

He's a one stop jive, makes my cherry pop
He's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candy man (oh)
A sweet talkin sugar coated candy man

Whoa, yeah
Well, by now I?m getting all bothered and hot
[ these lyrics found on http://www.completealbumlyrics.com ]
When he hits my mouth he really hits the spot
He got lips like sugar cane, oh
Good things come for those who wait

(Tarzan and Jane were swingin' on a vine)
Candy man, candy man
(Sippin' from a bottle of vodka double wine)
Candy man, candy man

(Sweet, sugar, candy man)
He's a one stop, gotcha hot, makin all the panties drop
(Sweet, sugar, candy man)
He's a one stop, got me hot, makin' my *uh* pop
(Sweet, sugar, candy man)
He's a one stop, get it while it's hot, baby don't stop
(Sweet, sugar)

He got those lips like sugar cane
Good things come for ones who wait
He's a one stop jive with a real big *uh*
He's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candy man
(Say what) a sweet talkin sugar coated candy man
(Say) a sweet talkin sugar coated candy man, woo
A sweet talkin sugar coated candy man

Oooh, whoa
Candy man, candy man
Candy man, candy man
Candy man, candy man...

(Tarzan and Jane were swingin' on a vine
Tarzan and Jane were swingin' on a vine
Sippin' from a bottle of vodka double wine
Sippin' from a bottle of vodka double wine
Jane lost her grip and down she fell
Jane lost her grip and down she fell
Squared herself away as she let out a yell
Squared herself away as she let out a yell)

Joe.My.God delivers again

Please don't hit me.

We're back together.

Also, all my piercings now have jewelry. Great.

Nothing better to do

Sunday Bloody Sunday

VOTE FOR THE NEGRO! WOMEN SHOULD NOT HOLD POSITIONS OF POWER IN GOVERNMENT!