14 March 2006

Ah Yes, We are Thick as Thieves

Well...
What a week. Even though it's only Tuesday.

The sad news is GMc might move back to Canada. The good news is that I would now have someone to visit in Canada. The better news is that if he does in fact decide to go to Canada, there is a 95% chance that I can buy his house. The bad news is that my monthly housing payment would go from $557.00 to $958.00-ish, plus taxes and insurance escrowed (about $50 and $217) at a grand total of about $1,225.00. It's $667.00 more, but with SL living here it would be no problem. Also we could put all the utilities in his name to get a fresh start, without having to carry over the $739 gas bill (I just rec'd yesterday) or others. We wouldn't have to have Insight Cable, we could pick WOW! which is much better and way cheaper, for both cable and internet... (haha I just sounded like a commercial!) Overall, buying the house would not only be a good investment, but it would be the chance of a lifetime. It's not too far from work, I think it's like eight miles (considering I live exactly 2.0 miles from work now...) But it seems like a good idea, even though my monthly payment would be doubling. I already know I qualify, I've been pre-approved, so now we just have to make sure all the numbers are in order and GMc is down with it. Yay! And it's cool, because I already know what the house is like inside, GMc is having some worked-owed to him done by J2 and Cool R., such as some exterior work and a paint job inside, and I think Cool R. might be putting in some carpet or something. The only things that would probably need fixed would be whatever was found in the inspection. Of course I would need to clean from top to bottom, not because GMc is a dirty person (hardly!) but because I'm all anal about living in someone else's space. Yeah... It's an awful lot to think about, but I'm ready. Plus I have a home buyer's clause in my apartment lease which saves me from any monetary penalties upon breaking my lease to buy a house. The only thing is that I don't get my security deposit back, but that's fine because due to the kittens and their shenanigans I probably wouldn't get it back anyway!

I thought it would be a long time until I bought another house, but it looks like my luck is changing. That rocks.

So tonight I am meeting up with NB for the first time since about September. I have to pick him up because his car got destroyed by a drunk driver back in December, but that's alright, I don't mind. I just hope he doesn't try to put the moves on, haha. He's been awfully respectful of my relationship with SL, and I'm really hoping that we can have a real adult friendship. Not that he's the most important person in the world to me, of course, but we have a lot in common, we get along great, etc. The only reasons we really didn't date was because he had a child in Texas (well, since then the kid has moved here), his divorce wasn't final yet, and he works the graveyard shift and didn't feel he had time for a girlfriend. The fact that I had "dated" his brother and that was a big mess probably didn't help either! SB never had anything to do with NB and me though, so I don't think that was a huge factor. Anyway.

Last night I fell asleep around 23:00 I think... or it may have been closer to 22:30... Not sure. All I know is that I was fucking exhausted because I had been up until almost 06:00 Monday morning, on the phone with SL. We were fighting about stupid shit, because I'm too pesimistic and I think too much about MMA, and I feel that he always has to be so proud and know-it-all-ish. We just kept talking and talking and talking, and I'm pretty sure we got things resolved, for the most part. I think a lot of the reason why we fight so much is that I am miserable, and I'm sure that once I have this divorce through with I will feel much better. MMA is just a black spot on my life, and unfortunately until I get the divorce, that black spot is a black cloud hanging over. But I digress.
I fell asleep early, and I must have been into the deep REM because when my phone rang at 12:22, I was so confused. I kept staring at it, and finally pressed the talk button thinking that the phone was trying to talk to me and that's why it was crying (yeah... me and phones, when I'm sleeping, are not cool.) So I pressed the button, and listened, and I hear, "Hello?" and I say, "Who is this? Hello?" At this point I'm so scared that my phone-child is talking back to me, and I'm about to hang up when I hear, "Hello? Kel? It's I**." Which was the point when I woke up, and realised that I was talking to Poke. He had used his real name and it was strange because I always call him I** in real life, but not on here, and he always calls himself Poke. Strange. He wanted me to come to karaoke at Brewstir's on Sunbury, but I was sleeping so I said no, plus I told him how broke I still am until tomorrow when I get paid. We talked about things, generic things, and he asked if I was still not drinking beer, and I said yes except for on Sundays because you're allowed to do whatever you gave up on Sundays, and he said he would like to see me soon because it has been a long time. I said that would be swell and we would get together Thursday. Then I hung up the phone and immediately fell asleep.


I was told once that all my friends have either fucked me or want to fuck me, and that kinda irritated me a little bit. But when I realised that it isn't true, I was not irritated anymore. Then I thought about it - maybe I do hang out with a lot of guys that I have hooked up with, but I've only had about six one-night stands out of the fifty guys I've slept with. All the rest have either been my boyfriend, my "fuck-buddy", or my husband. And of the six one-night stands, only two of those guys have I never seen again. The other three went like this: either we decided that it wasn't a good idea, and once was enough, or we just never found ourselves in that position again (no pun intended), or there just wasn't chemistry. The last one was DS, and he can go stick something up his ass because even after banging him, I still think he's gay. But my point of all this is such - Of all the friends I have, they are all truly my friends, whether or not I slept with them in the past. That's all. Of all the friends that I have lost over the years, to their lack of loyalty, to their petty ways, to whatever... there was only one of them that is on The List, and that's TM. And that friendship wasn't like a normal friendship. My friends are good friends, and they are there for me when I need them.

I just realised I'm going on a tangent and I need a cigarette so I'm done for now.

Now, a great song by Jason Mraz. I love that guy.

"The Boy is Gone"

The boy's gone. The boy's gone home.


What will happen to a face in the crowd
when it finally gets too crowded.

And will happen to the origins of sound
after all the sounds have sounded

Well I hope I never have to see that day
but by god I know it's headed our way

So I better be happy
now that the boy's going home.
The boy's gone home.


And what becomes of a day for those
who rage against it

And who will sum op the phrase for all
left standing around in it


Well I suppose we'll all make
our judgement call

We'll walk it alone, stand up tall,
then march to the fall

So we better be happy now
that we'll all go home.


Be so happy with the way you are
Be so happy that you made it this far
Go on be happy now. Please be happy now

Because this is something else
this is something else

I tried to live my life and live it so well
But when it's all over is it heaven
or is it hell

I better be happy now that no one can tell,
nobody knows

I'm gonna be happy with the way that I am
I'm gonna be happy with all that I stand for
I'm gonna be happy now because the boy's going home.

The boy's gone home.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hate poke.

K said...

I know you do, honey. But he's getting better these days, it's a far cry from the un-circumsized Scottish loser of last summer. :)