La plupart de week-end de blah de toute l'heure.

Thursday we went to Eldo's for karaoke, which we haven't done in forever. It was a really fun time, I drank Harpoon, and lots of people were there. TomCat was there, Moose, GG, etc. We met a guy from Morristown New Jersey, and he was really nice. He talked to GG about the Seeing Eye Dog school. The Sir was there too, and we haven't seen him in forever. Overall, a great night.

Friday was fun too. GG and SL and I went to Jersey Mike's for dinner. GG and SL got giant sized subs, and I got a regular, and I barely finished mine... but they ate their whole subs! The HUGE ones! I was not surprised that SL could, but I didn't think GG would be able to. She's eaten a whole giant sub before, but it was a smaller type sandwich, not the Club Supreme with like five meats and cheese and bacon and toppings and all that. Whoo. After dinner we headed back to my house, and just chilled. GG finally got to see the upstairs of my apartment, and she thought it was cool, I think. The only bad thing that happened on Friday was that Mickey farted on GG's lap and made her throat feel funny- SL and I are used to it so we didn't even notice, but it was toxic to her! After we dropped GG off at home, SL and I went to Kroger in Graceland to buy meat and cat litter and some other stuff. I love that Kroger, it's so nice and clean and fancy.

Saturday I made omlettes for breakfast, and they were huge. I filled them with cheese, tomatoes, and green onions, and put fresh mushrooms in SL's (but not mine!) I was quite impressed with myself. We were going to go to Big Lots to buy some stepping stones to put on the patio, but SL mentioned that he had to pay his health insurance and I felt guilty for wanting to buy stones, so we didn't go. I napped all day and I don't know what SL did. He made steaks for dinner, and they were delicious, if a bit overdone. The flavor was awesome though. I made fries, green beans, and sauteed mushrooms/onions/garlic to go with it. Before the steaks we went to the pool, and it was so cold! It was also super crowded, which I hate. Kids were bumping into us and stuff, and it was not that fun. We only stayed an hour. While we were eating, Douger and his kid came over. His kid is so cute! I don't remember how old he is though, but he is a nice kid. We watched a movie on Saturday night... it was... Dark Water. Not too bad, not too great, but it was alright. I thought it was going to be scarier, but it was just mildly scary.

Sunday I was going to make blueberry pancakes for breakfast, but then I realized we didn't have any eggs. The next plan was to make blueberry biscuits, but then I opened the milk and almost yakked because it was so sour. And full. Needless to say, I was disappointed. I made pierogies instead, and then SL went to work. I watched the new Planet of the Apes, and it was great. I wouldn't pay money to see it, but it was on FX, so that was cool. I thought it was going to be like the original, which I love, but it wasn't really anything like it. But I did like the new one. I masturbated like 150 times, took a shower, and then went to Payless to buy some new sandals. They didn't have the hippie kind like I had before, so I got some Airwalk flops that rock. They are like slippers kind of, because they don't have that stupid stick to put between my toes. I hate that stick. After Payless I headed over to Kroger and did some MAJOR shopping, since our cupboards were literally bare, and spent $183.68. I was very proud of myself. I rearranged all the cupboards and the fridge and the freezer, and our shelving once again looks like a grocery store. Yippy! SL came home around eight-fifteen, and I was making Crunchwraps for dinner... except they didn't really work out. I had all the right ingredients, but the tortillas would not wrap around the tostadas. It kinda sucked, but it tasted good anyway, so that was okay. After dinner we went to Eldo's for karaoke, and it was an alright time. I got kinda drunk, but not really, and it was kind of annoying. We had fun though, and we won a t-shirt and a hat. We got White Castle on the way home, and I will just say that their garlic cheeseburgers are super garlicky. Woah.

So, this thing has been happening to me. I'm pretty much completely miserable, and I know it's ruining SL's life. He's not happy anymore, and it's my fault. But I can't get out of this funk, feeling like a failure and a terrible person and all that. I blame it all on MMA, but I suppose I should blame myself for marrying him in the first place. I just wish I could be happy.

SL really hurt my feelings last night, because I felt like he didn't care at all about what I was trying to tell him. I was thinking about how I would like to move to Massachusettes, because I'm always so happy when I go there. I've always visited during a time of strife in my world, and going to Salem really makes me at peace with things. SL said I was crazy, that's not true, and it's just because I'm on vacation. I think he's wrong. I think I'm supposed to be there at some point in my life. Maybe I used to live there in a different life or something, I don't know. When I said that he said there is no such thing as reincarnation. Basically he kept putting down every single thing I had to say, so I just went to sleep because I didn't feel like having to defend my beliefs at three o'clock in the morning. I don't know what to do about that. If his beliefs are so different from mine, this relationship will never last and we will never be able to raise children together. I feel kind of betrayed because he was being so close-minded, and because suddenly he has all these strong religious feelings that I never knew about before. I always thought we were on the same page, or at least in the same chapter, but it seems that I was mistaken.