The Biggest Shock of 2007

My luck *may* have actually changed.

Thanks to my mom's good credit, I finally got approved for the student loan that I needed to go to school. WOO HOO!

I'm no longer the saddest girl in the world.

The Only Thing That's Real

I haven't been this depressed in years. I may have written before about being sad or miserable, but I am really truly depressed at this moment. I didn't get approved for the student loan to help with extra finances, so now I can't go to school. There is no way I can pay my bills just working at DQ, so I've applied for a waitressing job at this restaurant down the street. Why does this shit happen to me? What the fuck have I ever done? I'm so embarassed too because I told everyone that I was going to Culinary School and now I'm just stuck at the DQ praying to god or whomever that I can get my shit together. I have to get poverty assistance to pay my utilities, well, I should say I have to try because I probably make too much money to qualify for any aid.



If you have no place to live and nothing to live for, what's the point of being alive? I'm in so much emotional pain right now. I've never felt like this before. 2007 has been the worst year of my entire life. Every time something shitty happened, I would say "Ok. That's it. There is nothing shittier than this." and then something WAY shittier would happen. Like getting laid off and then GMaP dying.

Jesus Christ, when will it end?

I'm Alive, It's Okay!

We're gonna do this by labels since I have so much shit to cover, LOL!

Banking: I have no money!

Bishop: I'm kinda sad because I haven't been seeing much of Bishop. I miss him. I see him occasionally at karaoke, but since Cat started doing Trump's on Friday's, nobody comes to Groucho's anymore! Plus he was dating one of his ex's, which didn't work out cuz she was a bitch, but now he's seeing this other chick that we know, which rules.

Could anyone not love this face?

Dreams: WOW! I've had the most fucked up dreams in the last month. I dreamt that Poke actually told his mom about us dating, dreamt that I was pregnant, dreamt that I was saving the word, there were monsters everywhere, etc. All such craziness, and now that I want to write about them, I can't seem to remember a single one. Damn.

These are the tits that save the world.

Family: Well, let's see. As you know my GMaP died on her birthday this past August. That really sucked, but she was 90 years old, so it wasn't completely unexpected. I think we really thought that when it was time for her to go, she would get super sick or something, instead of just randomly dying the way she did. I went up to Cleveland for one of SJK's football games a few weeks ago and stopped by All Saints to see her. The dirt on the grave still had no grass on it, and I was crying, and then my parents showed up which was kind of a strange coincidence. But it was ok.
That night we went to the game and we own, of course, GO EAGLES! SJK has been playing very well this year, except for the last three games, which they lost. Up until then it was an undefeated season. I just don't know what happened. Hopefully they can pull out of it though, but I doubt there is a chance for the playoffs at this point. I could be wrong though. Shit, I don't know anything about football!
So my mom has been irritating me lately, because I'm going back to college (more on that later) and instead of being cool about it and supporting me and being happy for me, she's just rubbing it in my face that I didn't go before now and basically in her eyes I've fucked up my entire life. It's very frustrating. I'm trying to be civil but sometimes it's so hard when she embarrasses me in front of the admissions person by telling her what a fuck up I am for not listening to her and going to college seven years ago. Gawd.

GO EAGLES!

Friends: Let's see. The one year anniversary of my friend Crash dying will be a week from today, on October 21st. Cat has been a little bit sadder lately, talking about him and stuff. I feel for her. I don't know what I would do if I lost Poke! I've been trying to talk to my friends more than I used to, like GG and KP and SV, cuz I rarely get to see them and shit like that. I'm not doing a very good job, but I'm making the effort. I found out that a friend of mine, MM, has gout, so I'm quite worried about her too. Good things that have happened are: J-Rod did not go back to war, RM is getting a promotion, GG went back to school and she and Ironhorse will be celebrating their two year anniversary in a few weeks, KP is moving back into town, Cat turned fifty!, BI moved in with Big Joe, Dooger is doing well, and... that's about all I can think of right now!

Kel-Bell and KP are so sexy!

Karaoke: Hadn't been going to karaoke very much because for almost all of September I had bronchitis. Stupid change of seasons. Anyway, there was another contest, and I didn't think I would get to be in it because I still had no voice when it started. Luckily this week two spots opened up at Rush Creek in the Continent and at Gordy's. I tried at Rush Creek on Tuesday, but it was awful. Some bitch who claimed to be a professional singer won, even though she fucked up singing "Purple Rain". Oh well. So I tried on Thursday at Gordy's and won, since the other three bitches couldn't sing their way out of a paper bag. If that makes sense... Anyway, this one bitch who was there competing against me caught me outside while I was smoking and she was like"So what is this, a popularity contest?" and I'm like "WTF no, I only have like 6-8 friends out there!" and she's like "Bullshit all those people in there are your friends, I know, I asked. I sang much better than you and I got more applause and I should have won!" I just changed the subject because luckily Poke came outside right at that moment. What a dumb hooker. She wasn't even good. AND! She did not get more applause than me. The whole fucking place clapped for me, so suck that you dumb cock muncher. But I digress.
The contest was yesterday at Beulah Park just like last time. They started an hour and a half late, it was so sunny that I got burnt, and the whole thing was a joke. Lady K and I should have won, and Bishop and OA should have won too (it was split into "fillys" and "stallions".) So fucking ghey. We're done now, since the whole damn thing was a big rig. Same as last year, the people who won were all friends of a judge and / or the lady who was running it. And they were all from the west side. Bullshit!!

What the fuck, mother fucker?!

Life in General: So, I am going to culinary school, yay! I sent in all my monies and shit, got my schedule, and I'm ready to go. It starts October 29th. I'm so excited. Fuck HNB! I'm so glad that I'm not working there anymore! I think that in all my years since I've graduated high school, that was probably the worst job I've ever had. It was mindless, irritating, boring as fuck, and the women I worked with, save for like 5 of them, were all gossiping old biddies who have nothing better to do than create rumours and yap all day. My old boss from high school from the DQ offered me a job I couldn't pass up , so I took that and I've been there a week. It's so awesome. When I worked at DQ in the summer, at the other one, it was awful. But this one, wow, so great. It's like I never left. I think part of the reason is that I'm not working with cunty little teenage girls, since there are only like 3 or 4 girls whole work there, and that TT (the boss) is a friend of mine, more or less, and we trust each other and I don't have to prove anything. If he says I am/do/know/etc, they listen. It's awesome. So I'll be working there until school starts, every day, and then once I'm in class I'll be working a couple nights per week plus on weekends. Good times.

Look how ugly I am when I work inside the lime green box called HNB...

OSU Football: WE'RE UNDEFEATED! WOO! And now, since California lost to Oregon, we're NUMBER ONE IN THE BIG 10!! YAY!!

Poke: Wonderful. Coming up on our one year anniversary. Even though we took some months off this year, with all that stupid crap, we decided to go ahead an celebrate it as if we hadn't broken up at any point. He's apologized and made good on his word(s) so I think it's going to be wonderful from here on out. As a matter of fact, Poke almost beat JAFH's record for most romantic thing ever when I told him I wanted this dog and he was going to buy it for me as a surprise. But I talked him out of it when he kept grilling me about the fucking thing. I was like "No no no I couldn't take care of it or train it or anything." That's when he told me he was really going to buy it. LOL!

Oktoberfest!

Work: Uh, well, see above under "Life in General". Hahaha!

I guess that's about it. Go check out my photobucket for new pics. They're all arranged pretty like and so forth. Every single album has new pics in it too, except the tattoos/piercings album because I haven't gotten any new ones... sniff...

Yep. I'm a blonde now.

I Love GMaP

My Own Double Standard

So.

I hate these bitches who are always leaving comments and emailing Poke on MySpace. It's really very irritating, and I'm not 100% sure why. I just hate it. It's not like I think he is cheating or anything or blah blah blah. Not at all. I guess I'm just so insecure in myself that I'm afraid he's going to find someone way awesomer than me and leave me for her. I don't know why I think this, he's told me time and time again that things are different this time. He's even said all this shit to his friends, like I mentioned in the post before last. I guess it will just take time to prove that he's right.

On the other hand, the guy at Taco Bell hit on me today. It was cool, made me feel all special, but it was nothing compared to when I wake up in the morning, roll over, and Poke tells me I'm pretty - pretty beautiful! Yay.

I Rule at Making Videos!

My Bad!

Well I know it's been a really long time since I updated. Shit has just been happening and I find myself just wanting to lay on the couch more than be on the stupid computer. But I thought I owed you all an update, so here you go.

Poke: Things are awesome. We've moved into this other phase of our relationship, it's wonderful. I don't worry about things anymore, I think he's finally realized that marriage isn't evil, and it's all working out quite nicely. He's told his friends on several different occasions that he knows I'm the only girl for him and he couldn't ask for anything more, etc. He even told JW that he's never going to be into another girl, that I'm IT. YAY!

Work: Shitty. The job itself is fine, but $10 an hour just isn't cutting it. I can barely pay my bills, seeing as how my monthly net is almost $100 less than my bills. I won't know until like October 22nd-ish whether or not I'm even getting hired full time. I would think that after two months of training and all the time they're spending on us, plus my awesomeness, that I would get hired on as a real employee, but you never know. We all know what my luck is like.

Life in general: Fair. OSU football finally started, with a kill on YSU Penguins (how ghey) and a surprise from the north when Appalachia State out of North Carolina beat Michigan. So fucking great! SJK's games are the highlight of my week from now until whenever they reach the playoffs and however far they get there. To end my post, here is an article all about him.

Watterson heats up to stymie Willoughby South

By SETH SHANER

SNP photo by Seth Shaner Watterson junior JG (20) uses a stiff arm to gain some leverage on a run during the Eagles' 38-0 opening-week home win over Willoughby South Friday. Heat, humidity and the smallest of breezes set the stage for the Bishop Watterson football team to shine at Hagely Field Friday. The Eagles (1-0) shined brighter than the setting son, defeating visiting Willoughby South 38-0. Running the ball was not a problem for one team, while it doomed the other as Watterson pushed the Rebels backward to the tune of minus-47 yards. The Eagles were bolstered by a 94-yard day on the ground from junior KO, and outgained Willoughby South 337-92. The smoothest play of the game came with 5:01 to play in the second quarter. On a one-play drive that took all of six seconds, senior quarterback MT lofted the ball up the left sideline from the Rebels' 34-yard line. Running stride-for-stride with a Willoughby cornerback, senior receiver SJK looked up, saw the ball and broke away in the final 10 yards to pull the ball in for the score. "That's our fastest guy," coach DB said. "He's a track kid and he runs great. He has really good speed and you just try to take advantage of what he can do and get him the ball." T was glad to see the play work. "SJK did a great job running it down," he said. "He has great speed. He has a burst that not many people on the football field have. Having him is a great asset for our team." SJK felt confident the play could be successful. "I knew it was coming right to me. We've been working on that pass in practice and it just came so natural for us. We've hit the pass all the time and we knew the corners were pressing us, so we just changed it up at the line and it worked." Watterson's other touchdowns were of the running variety. Senior JP scored on a 1-yard run with 4:33 to play in the first quarter. Senior kicker MR nailed a 27-yard field goal with 5:22 to play in the first half, giving the Eagles a 10-0 advantage. KO scored from four yards out with 48 seconds to play in the half and later scampered 54 yards to score with 11:12 to play in the fourth. Junior BB punched it in for the final score of the game from a yard out with 3:34 to play. The game was played in the same kind of heat the Eagles have been practicing in for much of the past three weeks, and getting the chance to take their aggression out on an opponent was a good thing. "It's very rewarding because it has been very hot," Coach DB said. "I think our kids have handled it really well. I think this is probably one of our most in-shape teams. I'm not sure really why, but we've been handling the heat really well in practice and it showed tonight." Watterson is scheduled to travel to Pickerington North Friday, Aug. 31, at 7:30 p.m. The Panthers are coached by first-year boss Tom Phillips, who most recently coached at Bexley, where he won 21 games in three years.

It Happens

Alice V. (D) P
ALICE V. P (nee D), age 90, of Northfield Center. Beloved wife of the late Carl R. P; dear mother of Mary Alice (Dennis) K; loving grandmother of Kelly, Scott and the late Mary Alice K; dear cousin of Mary Jane W; sister of the late Thomas, Rev. Joseph, Margaret, William, Paul, Mary and Charles D, Sr. Mary Carlotta, OSU and Dorothy Kirk; and aunt of many. Died Thursday, Aug. 2, 2007. The family suggests memorial contributions be made to Ursuline Sisters, 2600 Lander Rd., Pepper Pike, OH 44124. Friends will be received SUNDAY 2-5 P.M. AT JOHNSON-ROMITO, A GOLDEN RULE FUNERAL HOME, 99 W. AURORA RD. (RT. 82 ONE MILE WEST OF RT. 8), NORTHFIELD CENTER, OH 330-468-1443, where prayers will be held 9:30 a.m. Monday, Aug. 6, 2007 followed by Mass of Christian Burial at 10 a.m. at St. Barnabas Catholic Church, 9451 Brandywine Rd., Northfield Center, OH. Burial at All Saints Cemetery. Plain Dealer Obituary Here

=)

And now, I have a reason to seriously work on getting divorced.

Someone wants to marry me someday...!

=)

I'm A Little Bit Angry

Lost in 2007:

1 boyfriend
1 license
1 boyfriend (the same one, see below)
1 job
5 lbs
1 home

Gained in 2007:

1 boyfriend
1 boyfriend (we broke up twice this year in case you weren't paying attention earlier)
5 lbs
1 roommate & his cat


If you are on MySpace then you already know my story of how my fucking landlord broke up with his girlfriend, she is kicking him out, and he, therefore, is kicking me out. I'm really expecting people to start dropping dead of nothingness because there is NOTHING ELSE I COULD LOSE! I'll swear I'll kill myself if Poke dumps me when he gets back from vacation. Dealing with that would just be way too much to expect from me.

Damnit All to Hell

So, it used to be that white people were racist. Then black people became racist once they were freed. And then white people got racist amongst their own kind, ie, Dirty Micks and Stupid Polaks and so forth. NOW the fucking Mexicans are getting in on it. I've just about had it with everyone being so fucking politcally correct!! You came from Mexico? You're a goddamn wetback. You're Italian? Fucking Dago! My god! I'm german, polish, female, and fat. Do you think that I don't hear my share of shit? Do you think that I don't get looks because I'm fat? It's okay to be a fat black woman, then you're all snap snap and shit. But a fat white girl seems to always be looked at as white trash even when it's not true. I'm not a lower life form just because I weigh twice as much as you. Fuck! I swear to god, if I have to hear one more thing about politcal correctness, I might just shoot myself in the foot. No, not the foot... YOUR FOOT! You stupid moronic fucking media people who egg everyone on and create all this bullshit bullshit! Grrr!

Now, I must take a shower. I miss Poke so much. He'll be home in like four days though... I can't stand not having anyone intelligent to talk to about Walker and Lifetime movies and the irony of things... *sniff*

PS - I'm having an in-house sale this weekend so come and buy my shit so I can pay my bills.

The Baconator

So things have been going just fine since I last posted. I was hit with an incredible bout of depression, but I worked through it and now I only cry sometimes instead of all the time. Poke and I are doing better than ever, which rules, and we're going on a month of being together. I'm kinda sad thought cuz Friday he leaves on a cruise with JW for a week. That's just gonna suck. But on the brightside, I start my job at HNBC Monday! At least I'll have something to distract myself instead of sitting at home all day wondering how much fun Poke's having!

Last night we went over to JW's house for some beers and fireworks, which turned out quite nicely. I don't know where they got them from, but the fireworks they had were pretty cool. They went up pretty high and were all colorful and crackly the way fireworks should be. I got to meet JW's girlfriend, she was pretty nice, and of course some of the old friends were there. I was worried that they might give Poke some shit, but on the way over he and I talked about it and I found out that it's not really just me that they're against, it's any girl. That's so sad! They should be happy if their friend is happy! God knows that my friends have seen all the shit I've been through, but they know I'm happy with Poke so they're happy for me. Oh well, you can't please everyone. We had a great time there last night, and on the way home we were singing crazy songs in the car, then stopped at Wendy's for some food. Poke decided on "The Baconator" (see picture above) and I think that we both gained about 5 lbs from eating it and also helped those heart attacks come a little sooner... cripes. It's a huge fucking sandwich with like 3 patties, 4 pieces of bacon, mayo, ketchup, and cheese. Talk about a buster!

Anyway, I'm supposed to go to my parents' house today for food and stuff, but they haven't called me to tell me when it's all going down. So, til then, I will be watching shitty TV like every other day I've been off... Ce'st la vie!

Wig in a Box

If only I had the wig part... *sniff* I still feel the same way as he does, like when I go to karaoke I can be someone completely different and just rock the fuck out. Hell yah. I should get a crazy Dolly Parton wig.

Few Things

I'm a super happy girl right now. Despite feeling like a big worthless piece of crap, job-wise, my personal life is swell. Yay.

Here, do this. My life depends on it.

What color should I dye my hair? Keep it Orange! Stoplight Red Chocolate Brown Blackest Black Bleach Blonde Something with Stripes View Results

Sweet Slideshow

You can like, make music and stuff on it. Play with the buttons at the bottom! Neato!

Emu on the Hunt

Well the DQ thing didn't work out because I can't manage teenagers. Teenage girls specifically. I'm a good leader and a strong person, but I just didn't have the will or the heart to try and stick it out with those walking mouths. So, I quit. I talked to my boss for a good half hour and she tried to convince me that everything would work out, but seeing as how I'd only been there three days and I was already dreading going to work, I knew that it was over.

Yesterday I had an interview with a very fancy finance corporation downtown. I'm hoping they hire me because I think it would be a cool place to work. I'm going to be fucked if I don't find something soon because I only have one more check coming from Midwest and BI still owes me over $600 (as of this coming Sunday) and I don't know if he's going to pay it or not. If he doesn't, I have to evict him, which will suck.

Other than having no job, life has been fairly drama-free. I don't think I mentioned it before, but EB and I aren't friends anymore because I found out she was hanging out with Poke. I called her out on being a fake and a liar, and she proceeded to email this letter to everyone she knows, and added her own little snippets to each one. So now I have a bunch of people mad at me, thinking I was talking shit, when really the email was about Emily for Emily and really had nothing to do with anyone else. It's so pathetic when people do childish things like that. They really have way too much time on their hands!! I guess it's ironic though, how I got all in a tizzy about them hanging out and it ended up with he and I getting back together... so thanks, bitch, for being a "friend"!!

I just found out that there is a rumour going around that I got laid off because I was late to work one too many times. Well let me tell you, OH, that I did not get laid off due to being late. I'm not going to justify your lies with an explanation, but I will say that the reason I got laid off had absolutely nothing to do with who was the better processor or anything like that. So go suck a dick, you white trash cunt. The only good thing about getting laid off is that I don't have to see or hear your dirty mouth anymore. I know you complained about this blog to the boss, I could hear your loud mouth through the walls, and I'll bet he was laughing inside because he probably agrees with me. I can't speak for him though, it's merely an observation. You and your fucking baby daddy drama have no place in an office - you need to get yourself a job at the Wal*Mart and let the white collar people be free of your disgusting white trash presence.

But I digress... I really couldn't give a flying fuck about any of that crap, I'm happy for now. Here are some awesome pics!!

.Poke.Me.Cute.

Poke, fucked up, making a really silly face.

BIG SMILES!!

Poke sings... I don't remember what.

Poke is afraid of the camera? Or confused about something?

Awwwwww. It's almost sickening.

We are so damn cool.

What's up there?!

We like to kiss, it's good for our health!

He thought I was taking a picture of someone in front of us...

Some Random Pics

These are my new shoes!



Here's a really cool pic of my new shoes!


Self-explanatory.

Fox in a box.

Blue Kelly.

Black and White Kelly.

Up CLOSE Kelly.

Sepia Kelly. Looks antique.

DQ Emu

Alright, so here's what has happened since the last post:

• Back together with you-know-who. (I'm a glutton for punishment.)
• Went on a few dates and they were mediocre.
• Got pounced on by two St. Bernards and three Golden Retrievers.
• Ate lots of food.
• Got a new job as shift manager at Dairy Queen!
• Spent my first night in West Jefferson (it was scary!)

That's about it. I haven't felt like posting because I've been very fucked up in my head, wondering wtf is going on, being angry because I got laid off, angry because BI still owes me almost $500, angry and sad because of everything that's happening. I'm not even so sure that I'm going to be all ecstatic about getting back together with Poke because it never works out. So I'll just chill and keep my mouth shut and hopefully it will.

The Way Things Were

Twenty-four hours ago, things were looking alright. Not great, but alright. I had been thinking to myself that FINALLY! everything was getting better.

Well, let me take you back a few months. When I got my DUI, I said to myself, there is only one worse (personal - not counting death of family/friends) thing that could happen, and that would be if I lost my job. Then, I would basically have no reason to go on.






I got laid off today.

Yet another list!

Things that absolutely disgust me:

• White trash
• Girls who have more than one child by more than one dude
• Ketchup
• Midgets
• Degoes
• Runny eggs (except for the yellow part, that I love!)
• Burps/Belches, especially when someone tries to speak while doing so
• Ants
• The weird texture that happens to mashed potatoes when you microwave them in a plastic bowl
• Dolphins
• Cottage cheese w/fruit on top
• Frisco sauce
• Jaeger (although I can't pass up a free shot of it, I just wince)
• The inside of a vagina, unless I'm watching a baby come out
• Furry pussies (what is this, 1978? Get a razor ladies!)
• Taint
• Small paperclips
• Paperclips with coating
• Ribbed paperclips (for your pleasure)
• Spittle from tobacco chew
• Drool in general
• The smell of a boy who's been playing outside all day
• Wet dogs (see above, they smell the same)

That's all I can think of. Those things listed above will actually make me gag - some just a little, some actually to the point of yakking. I'm a strange bird.