Quit pushing me, Trevor!!

Imagine a gang made up of all white red-headed guys. I think the dialogue would be something like, "Dude, step off I saw you diss me at The Gap" and "Shady Side! We stay inside cuz if we go outside we get sunburnt! Shady Side!" and "Meet my homies, Trevor, Ian, Fletcher, Randy."

Hahahaha - I got that from this comedian who was on Bob&Tom this morning. I can't remember his name. He's a funny dude.

Anyway, yesterday was fairly interesting. After work, TM came over with the pregnant stripper and we talked about jail while doing shots of Jack Daniel's and drinking beer. The pregnant stripper was getting mad because we were ignoring her, but I was nice and let her smell my beer since she couldn't drink it. She kept saying she was having contractions and I thought that was an interesting way to try and get attention. They left because the pregnant stripper's mom was cooking dinner, and while they were gone I took TM's $10 and went to ABC Liquor to buy a bottle of whisky. She dropped him off around eight p.m. and we did a few shots and then headed out to Crown by Polaris.

The Crown was ok, Spongy was there and that was the only person I knew (besides Cat, obviously.) I found out that Spongy is so weird because she had a massive brain injury a few years ago, I can't remember how it happened but somehow she cracked her head on something and it injured her spine and then spinal fluid was leaking into her brain. She didn't even know it until she started having seizures. I guess she has lost some of her long term memory and quite a bit of her short term memory too. She's already gone to 100 doctor's appointments this year alone. It seems like she has a good outlook on life, and that's awesome. Also, she's dating Wolfman and I never knew! They've been together since August. Spongy told me she was going to give me the name of some dude she knows where you can go to his studio and record a CD for like $5 a song and then she's going to give me the name of this dude in Nashville who wanted her to send him a CD. She wants me to become famous.
GMc showed up after awhile and bought a bucket of beer. We felt bad for TM because he has no ID so he couldn't drink. Doc showed up with some ho-bag. He ignored me and that was semi-upsetting. His ho-bag and her friends took over my area while I was up singing and I thought that was so rude. They just went to my chair, gave the waitress my 1/2 of a beer to take away and moved my cigarettes. I was like, "Are you fucking serious Clark?!" and so I went and said hi to Doc and told the ho-friend that she was incredibly rude and I hope she has a wonderful evening.

After that, GMc, TM, and I went to the other Crown in Powell then because they also have karaoke on Tuesdays. It was so completely dead. I think I sang about ten songs and GMc and TM probably sang ten or more each. There were only two other singers who kept putting in songs! There was this chick there that looked like a lesbian that GMc was hitting on big time. They sang "Picture" together, which upset me a little bit because the last time we were out GMc asked me to sing it with him but then we left instead, and then last night when we got there he asked if I wanted to sing a duet and I said "Sure" but he did it with the lesbian instead. Oh well. Anyway, the boys were just trying so hard to get this chick, and she was super nice but I really thought she was a lesbian for real. Not to mention that GMc and TM were doing shots of Jim Beam like it was their job. Well, really GMc was buying them and pouring them into glasses of Coca-Cola for TM. They were feeling pretty good and thinking they could get this girl, and then suddenly, *ta-da*, here comes Ol' Girl's fiancee. Hahahahaha! She was 36 and he was 49 and in a neck brace. Then the dude (who is plastered) starts trying to tell TM about his old wild and crazy days and so on. Dude grabs TM by the neck and starts talking shit. TM is just sitting there like, "What the fuck" and finally dude stops when he says he could rip TM's head off and shit down his neck and TM's gives him an evil look and says, "You think so?" reminding dude that TM just got out of jail that day. It was funny. They left and I was so incredibly bored even more than I had been because I wasn't drinking because 1) I had terrible heartburn and 2) I could tell that GMc was getting a bit on the tipsy side and it would probably be safer for me to drive and 3) I had no money.

Finally GMc finished his beer and we left and went back to the original Crown where I had left my car. We went in and sang a couple songs, and GMc and TM did another shot. The bartender girls sang a song and GMc and I danced to it. I'm not a very good dancer and I tripped a lot, plus he wanted to spin me around and I just can't figure out how to coordinate that shit. I decided to hand him off to TM, so they danced around in a silly way for the rest of the song, and pretended to trip each other and stuff like when GMc was "dipping" TM backwards. I thought it was hilarious, but the bartender girls thought that they were too drunk. When GMc went to order another round of shots, the one named Jamie told him they were cut off! Apparently GMc has never had good luck at this bar, and Jamie has given him lip before. Not cool. I don't understand what it is about these female bartenders that think they can be bitchy and get away with it. KL is the only nice female bartender I can think of... no wait, there's that one lady at Second Half that I just met the other day... the new girl, D from Zuey's is really nice too... Ok, so that's three. Stupid girls.

We left and I took TM back to the hotel. He was in a kinda upset mood because of everthing that happened and I can understand that. I still don't know what I'm going to do though. However, one thing is for sure, I'm not going to be the mediator between him and Y. There is no fucking way. It's not my job, I could never deal with that, and it's dangerous. TM isn't exactly a kitten here and if I get on his bad side, I'm done for. Is it right that I should be afraid of my best friend? I wonder.

After I dropped him off, I called Poke to come over. He had called me a few times during the night and was just waiting for me to call him. He arrived shortly after that and we hung out for a minute and talked and then he gave me a foot rub (yay! foot fetish!) and then he wanted to look at my nakey pics so I showed him a few, and then we did our thing. It was kinda funny this time because it didn't take too long and when it was over he was like, "Oh, man! Sorry!" I was just like, "It doesn't matter to me, I got what I want." We laid on the bed and talked about all kinds of things for awhile after that, and he ended up leaving around 4am. I couldn't sleep still so I read some of my book and I think I ended up falling asleep around 5am.

Tonight I'm thinking about going to Brewster's for Cat because Moose should be there and it's supposed to be fun. I might just go to Zuey's though. We'll see.