Just so you all know, Tuesday is my half birthday. I expect gifts. Someone has to go to Damon's with me because I have a coupon for a free onion loaf. First come first serve, you get to have dinner with ME on MY half birthday. And free onion loaf.
Anyway. I have had the funnest three days ever.
Thursday, KL called me during the day while I was at work and begged me to come see her. She said she had been worried about me since Thursday, after hearing about my brain tumour scare and the whole bullshit with TM. I told her why I was being a hermit, and she said that it didn't matter, I had to go see her. So after work, where I stayed until six forty-five (this has been the MOST stressful end-of-month EVER in the whole time I've worked here!) I went home, changed, and headed out to Zuey's. It was strange when I came in because it was like I hadn't missed anything, but then again, it's Zuey's, so I think I could go away for three months and come back and nothing would have changed.
I stayed at Zuey's for awhile, then I called Moose to see if Poke was at Eldo's. Moose wasn't there yet, but he called me when he got there and told me the coast was clear. So I finished my beer and for some odd reason drove to Eldo's (normally I would have walked.) The second I walked into Eldo's, I completely lost my memory. It was very odd. I remember being there, and I remember the following things:
- Talking to Billy the Big Dicked Indian's daughters
- Drinking 2 "Tie Me to the Bedpost"s
- Smiley J french kissing me, twice
- Yelling at someone about how much I hate Eldo's
- Peeing in the boys bathroom with Smiley J because I didn't feel like waiting in line
- Kissing GG on the cheek
That's all I remember! Kinda bugs me because I went back to Zuey's after all that I couldn't even remember then what I had just done. It was weird.
Back at Zuey's, a boy came up to me as I was giving K's nephew Z a backrub. He said something about liking me, and I was baffled. I was like "You don't even like me as a person let alone like like me!" He said I was wrong, he's liked me for awhile, but he was afraid that if we started anything, I would run my mouth at the bars and everyone would know our business. He was like, case-in-point, SB. I explained to him that actually SB and I hung out and did our thing for awhile before it was over, and only then did people hear me run my mouth about him because he fucked me over. He upset me and hurt me and then I had to deal with Cunt-Bitch Extraordinairre and all her bullshit. It was a big mess and that's why they heard about it. I told him that I never talk about intimate things about a boyfriend to just anybody. Maybe my best friend or something, but usually not even that. Sure, I might talk about the random losers I fuck, but mostly it because there is a funny or terrifying story to go with it.
Anyway, he understood, and said he wanted to ask me out or something back in the day, but then I started fucking NB, so he didn't. I was shocked that he liked me for that long, and I never even knew it. I mean, he rarely talks to me, I always have to say "hi" first, he never sits by me or anything. We've never really had a conversation, other than this one time that we were talking with another dude. I mean it's such a generic non-relationship. I literally almost fell out of my chair. He caught me before I did.
As I was leaving The Zue, I pulled out the totally OTHER way then I usually do. Normally, I back up and go south through the parking lot and over the little dip out towards Morse Road. This time, I backed up the opposite way and drove north through the parking lot away from Morse Road. Not sure why. Well this boy was standing there talking to Fuzz and came over to the car. He was like, "You're leaving already" and I said yes, I was in desperate need for Taco Bell. He asked if I might like to take him home with me. I said sure, hop in. So he did. We surely went to Taco Bell and then home, where I chowed while he laid on the floor and played with Sheeba. Then, we talked about important stuff, then we went upstairs and had some sex, and then fell asleep. In the morning I had to take him all the way back to Zuey's because he had left his truck there.
Work on Friday was semi-nightmarish. I left at three though, because I had an appointment to go to. I picked up GG and we got some subs from Jersey Mike's, and then came home and chilled while I waited for the RAC people to come and drop off my fixed washing machine. They finally showed up after five thirty. I was still waiting for the maintenance guys to come and change the locks, and when they didn't show by six fifteen, GG and I headed to the pool. We stayed for about an hour and a half, and it was crazy. We were so silly just splashing around and being ridiculous. It was cool to be silly like that, very relaxing. Every day I have to act like a grown up, and I like it when I can be silly with someone else who is silly and its just a big pile of silliness all over. It's great.
We came home and GG ate the rest of her sub and I ate my nachos left over from the night before. FINALLY the maintenance mexicans showed up to change my locks. They were only like four hours late, but whatever. GG and I watched Law & Order: SVU til nine, and then we headed to Zuey's. We stopped at her house to get Wendell first before we went though. At Zuey's, oh my god, it was packed. I couldn't believe it, but then again, Danielle was working and the dumb fucking DJ was there. We hung out for awhile, Skilley showed up (refer back to the post about my birthday) so we talked to him for a minute, then he left, Jclyn kept coming over to our table and randomly starting conversations and then walking away, and then Y called me. She was out with J and his brother and his brother's girlfriend, and they were bored so they wanted to come to Zuey's but they wanted to make sure TM wasn't there. He wasn't so they came. It was fairly unexciting, but then after they left and I took GG home I came back to Zuey's because I thought I had left my phone there (it was inbetween the seats the whole time!) I ended up talking to this guy, AD, and he invited me back to his friend's house where they were gonna chill and play some guitars and stuff. AD was super cute with fluffy blonde hair, oh geeze. He was little too, only about two inches taller than me and he weighed about a buck forty. Crazy little and definitely built like a ten year old, just how I like 'em! Anyway, we were down in this guy's basement when his girlfriend comes home. She was drunk, he was drunk, and hillbilliness ensued. Oh my god they were screaming and yelling like it was their job, so I asked AD if he would like to come to my house where it was hillbilly-free and he said yes. We went to my house, and sat on the couch for awhile and then went to bed. I really wasn't expecting to have sex with this guy, but then he's all like "I'm gonna hump you" and I laughed because he really did say "hump". We did anyway, but it was complete drunken humping and after awhile we both got too tired to do anything. Then he turned weird on me. He was like really demanding and being kinda cheauvanistic and shit. It was strange. I waited for him to fall asleep before I would.
I slept pretty much until four forty five on Saturday afternoon. I took him home and then GMc called, so I took the pizzas over to his place and we watched De-Lovely. Then I felt sick and thought I was going to yak in the bushes while I was out smoking, but I didn't. GMc felt okay, but he said the pizza had felt a little off to him, so he didn't eat much. We went to Zuey's then and it was pretty fun. Nicholas was there and he felt the need to tell us about how he donates to the sperm bank. Nicholas is probably one of the strangest and most un-attractive people I know, so it was gross to think of, but it made for hilarious jokes. GMc were worried that Zuey's would be boring, but it wasn't too bad.
The boy from Thursday night (who liked me) was there and before he left he invited me to come over to his place when I was done. I finally left around maybe one or so, I think, and went to his house. I drank some moonshine that tasted like creamed corn and it burned my mouth so badly. *shudder* We watched some Dave Chappelle's Show and then went to bed and had some sex. I woke up at some point in the morning and got completely freaked out because there was a gigantic buck head on the wall and I hadn't noticed it the night before. It scared me. I went back to sleep and woke up at what I thought was nine forty five and decided to go home. When I got to the car I found out it was actually eleven fifteen. Oh well.
Now I'm home, I'm about ready to go eat something and maybe go to the pool. Or maybe not.
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